the border cops

When I see you babe, I get this feeling in my jeans
I just try to keep the blood in my head, if you know what I mean

I ain't Will Hung, but I know how to work the stage
Live fast, die young and leave a pimped-out MySpace page
And let me rock your world
With my penis
I'm gonna rock your world
With my penis

You got a couple of kids, well I think that's kinda hot
Don't be shy, c'mon baby, show me your tots

I'll take you out around the block if you lend me a little cash
Gotta get the car home by 10 o'clock
So we'll go back to my mom's and crash

But then I'll rock your world
With my penis

What was she thinking when Brad cut the cord
Oh, that stupid whore, I will get her
What was he thinking when Jen slammed the door
Angie’s lips are pure, that's for certain
We’ll get naked

It doesn’t to seem matter, it’s always a treason
North Dakota to Hollywood, there’s one feeling
Welcome to misery...

'Cause it’s you and needs
You’re married to yourself
There’s no news to speak
Love and lose it’s real, it’s fake

What was Dad thinking when he shut the door
Well, my wife’s a bore, I must replace her
What was Mom thinking when she tied the score
Well, let's start a war, the kids are taken
You’ll make payments

It doesn’t to seem matter, it’s always a treason
North Dakota to Hollywood, there’s one feeling
Welcome to misery...

He’s a believer, he’s got an angel on his side
But he doesn’t need her, for him the rules just don’t apply
And he’s our man
Promising endless summer, a real up-and-comer
And I can’t shake this thing
Something bad’s gonna happen

I never signed on for this
American death wish
You’d better dazzle me, boy

He’s a cowboy with a big old cowboy ranch
And he’s got a posse to carry out his cowboy plans
Ask him why
And he’ll give you an answer as funny as cancer
Don’t you get in his way
Or the badass be layin’ the smackdown

I never signed on for this
American death wish
You’d better dazzle me, boy

Now you can offer me a beer but you can’t make me drink
We threw our drummer in the pool but we could not make him sink
And you can spell it all out for some people but they still won’t think

I never signed on for this
American death wish
You’d better dazzle me, boy

Late again, she's tearin' out the door
She got a fire under her ass
To meet a friend, it's all she's livin' for
And I can hear her sayin'

Time to roll, don't wanna waste the time that's left me
'Cause I know that little bastard's out to get me

She can't slow down, she takes it all in
One step forward, two steps behind
If she goes down, she's gonna do it swingin'
And I can hear her sayin'

Time to roll, I heard the big old sea is spreading
And I know that dirty bastard's tryin' to get me
Yeah, he'll get me

You can change topography
Yet you can't chase away this disease
And now she prays for a glimmer of strength
To beat the buzzer, save the game

Time to roll, I heard the big old sea is spreading
And I know that dirty bastard's gonna get me
I wish he'd forget me

No staff to raise this boy
He wanders as he knows
No test to find what’s wrong
And God can’t believe

Son of Sam still around today, he draws a picture of a man
And he plans to end his day
Son of Sam is just a kid again, got his finger on the trigger
Bet a father could make his day

So set to raise his voice
And scare his friends away
I’ll bet he’ll kill no choice
I can’t believe

Blow off some built-up steam
On some trashy TV porn
'Cause I like to think I’m safe
When sex is on

Go time, he’s made his choice
Your picture in his hands
No brakes to break this boy
I can believe

Son of Sam still around today, he draws a picture of a man
And he plans to end your day
Son of Sam is just a kid again, got his finger on the trigger
And he’s gonna shoot you dead

Son of Sam still around today, he draws a picture of a man
And he plans to end your day
He’s got an itchy trigger finger
And he’s gonna shoot me dead